THE CONSCIOUS MUM
I Am What I Say I AM
What is a Conscious Parent?
What is Consciousness in Parenting, it is like a feeling of evolution, you do not need to be unconscious. That is not what it means what it does mean is that you become aware when you have become unconscious in your behavior. When you are doing things unconsciously of the track or being triggered by something from our past instead of being in the present.When you are fulfilling your own needs and not your child's needs at the moment. become aware of overdoing or trying to make life glamorous you need to get away from this. When you stay in the present moment you are in tune with your child at that minute and you see things as they are really Conscious and can see your real child. But you have to get out of doing too much at the moment and thinking intellectually instead of being in that moment, you lose your connection. in the moment you are in tune with your child.
I Am What I Say I AM
Conscious Spiritual Discipline
A Spiritual approach to discipline changes parents' usual thoughts to discipline. In the conscious or spiritual look at discipline, you move away from focusing on the bad behavior or looking at the child from the point of view as a problem behavior that needs to be fixed, you entirely remove that thought and start afresh with new thoughts. What is that thought it is the perspective of the understanding that the behavior of the child is showing off a child's underlying need that has emerged in the child from the relationship they have with the parent and inwardly in the child. The stronger the connection with the parent and the stronger the child's connection inwardly the need for discipline is less. You need to realign the parent and child relationship. Look and find out what has come apart in the relationship ie the glue between the parent and child that has come undone .Which now manifests in problematic behavior. Next, you need to get the parent to look at the trigger in the child ie making the parents see what is being exposed in the parent ie the conflict area, our children are the best at pushing our buttons. When the child exposes a button they are showing us something that has been exposed in us and this unresolved wound in us makes us react to them and this can spiral into problematical behavior because you are dealing with an unattainable wound or need in ourselves., and we are failing the emotional needs of the child. Discipline problems are always a manifestation of an unmet emotional need.
I Am What I Say I AM
How Conscious Parenting can Help Teenagers!
Facts are showing Teenagers are in Crisis -Parenting is needing to be changed for the way we bring up our daughters.
A psychologist Dr. Tara Porter says in the Times Health Section that parents need to stop "Extreme Parenting but need to start showing and teaching their daughters "emotional competence, which can easily be shown with Conscious Parenting.
Teenage girls are having problems describing their feelings, instead, they are starving themselves, cutting themselves, and trying to be hermits in life ie withdrawing from their life and parents do not know how to help.
It has been reported in Britain some parents are sleeping outside their child s bedrooms to stop them from self-harming as the NHS Services (AMHS) self-harming Which is the Adolescents Mental Health Services, is so stretched by the demand that it has got to the situation of"breaking point".Parents and teenagers are having to wait over two years for young people at risk of suicide to be seen by psychologists or professionals and more young people are being referred it is up to fifty -two percent since last year if you compare it to 2020/2021.
Parents and Psychologists are so desperate to help but are having problems teaching young people in pain to think differently. How do you help a young adolescent cope with challenges and adversity? Nowadays there is never-ending pressure from, society, social media, education, and even parents. Parents are now needing to make their daughters believe they are good enough, and that they do not care about their grades. They are now having and to say they want them just to be happy in their life but so many of the parent's self-worth is tied to their daughters or child's achievements.
This is why I teach Conscious Parenting it is so good for situations like this. It shows you as a parent how to let go of your desires, ego, and attachments to what your child does. Instead behaviors of forcing behaviors on their child, parents focus on their own language and expectations. Essentially it removes the pressure on children and gets the parents to look at their unconsciousness as parents.
Another quick solution to help teenage girls girls in this situation is to change these mindsets quickly ie (MSS ) Mindset Strategic Steps. I have helped teenage girls to change their thoughts Quickly. To start living a healthier life, staying away from toxic situations friends and how to use social media for their needs, not for comparison or for negative interactions. Then they can start to see the many good possibilities for their future ie they change their mindset from seeing all the problems and negative possibilities to seeing all the good positive possibilities for their future lives which is how it should be.
I Am What I Say I AM
Conscious Mum-Being a Mother is a Spiritual Practice
Being a mother is a Spiritual Practice because it is a constant act of turning inward to get yourself stable so that you can be adaptable with the other person.
to practice presence to practice faith to practice patience to practice surrender it is a practice of compassion
it is everything that a Spiritual Person wants it is a Spiritual practice that is fully under the umberella of MUM ie a CONSCIOUS MUM
I Am What I Say I AM
Conscious Mum-How To Stop Affecting your Children
How do you stop your anxieties from affecting your children? Family Matters are important and it now could be a difficult time to raise a family,from the cost of living crisis ,people concerned about climate change ,but you can keep you and your children happy and calm .Life is full of uncertainty but as a parent your job can be to lessen the impact of this.If you have worries and anxieties,why not reduced the amount of bad news you see.When you stop worrying about what you can see going on in the world that you cannot change and instead focus on what you can influence or change,such as connecting to helping your children thrive and grow into confident, happy people. Do not watch a lot of bad news about the world on a daily basis,that do not actually affect your life ie if you had not read a piece of bad news or seen it on social-media you would not be sad or upset ,stop choosing to "doom scroll this will have a calming relaxing effect to your life and family. Did you know some women are so concerned about what they see as a frightening world we live in ,that they are choosing not to have kids,while some Mums-to -be seem to be worrying about their decision because of the war in the news,climate change and economic meltdown.While people who are already parents are worrying about their children s futures People need to stop so they can see the wonder of being a parent and having your kids brought up in a house full of anxiety. Families need to be realistic,every generation experiences struggles,so teach your children to be brave and to take positive risks is a necessity,and set your children so they can see the world around them as full of limitless possibilities.so they will thrive.
I Am What I Say I AM
Consciously Connect with Your Children For Good Mental Health!
Your children need to feel connected to you for them to have a better Mental Health, you can do this by being involved with them in their daily activities, mainly being interested in them if .they have a challenge or a meltdown moment This will help them if you work with them and ask them "Did something happened today, with your friends or your studies? "Or did Something something happened that made you feel unhappy?" Younger children need lots of 1on1 playing time with you to feel connected to you. My advice from experience you need to spend lots of time playing together is vital for their stability and necessary for their emotional well-being. younger children believe you are their best friend, they feel an emotional connection with you when you play and look after them. Instead of working and sitting in a chair all day getting up and jumping or running around with your children, it`s a way to de-stresses even for adults
OLDER CHILDREN OR TEENAGERS
After now bringing up 5 teenagers, I have found a way. for them to tell me they want to talk about a situation that is disturbing or making them uncomfortable by mentioning red traffic lights you can even use this technic at a younger age. It is an agreement you have between you as a parent and your teenager or children and if they want to talk about something that has happened with during the day ie with friends, study, college, the university they can say Red Traffic light so they can talk about it straight away or if it is not an emergency you can talk about it, later on, that week.
I Am What I Say I AM
Conscious Parenting Advice
Parenting advice never seems to work at the moment. Parenthood is one of the only journeys "s which can push your buttons. Children know intuitively what to do at the moment to make parents feel uncomfortable, and parents always mean well and want to deal with the situation at the moment but never seem to get it right even if they have read a lot of parenting books or gone through seminars the information they absorb doesn't serve them. The reason for this is the information you get is not for the parent nor for the child"s benefit, so unless the person who wrote the book or a therapist is beside you at the exact moment to guide you on how to respond to a specific challenge that you are faced with. Parents can realign their relationship with their children. They need to understand how to shift their energy together. Children are often seeking approval for their behavior, Once the parent understands this concept they then understand how to respond with love and constructive guidance to heal the pain the child is going through connecting and aligning with their child. Parents can really allow the child to understand the reason why they are hurt and angry and really see the child's true essence.
I Am What I Say I AM
Conscious Parenting Lesson
If you want to Conscious Parent try to remove "NO, NOT, and DON t out of your vocabulary when speaking to your child or future children. How many times when you were growing up did you hear these words over and over again Some of you will think CHANGING THESE 3 WORDS, MAD OR NOT POSSIBLE you must have heard them possibly 200 or 1000 or possibly a million times before you were 5 years old????
Phrases like
, don t jump don t run don t run near a pond
No, stop that, No crying, etc. For those of you with kids, how many times have you said these words to your children? It is difficult not to use these words to start with when speaking to your child. BUT YOU WANT TO REMOVE THESE NEGATIVE WORDS FROM YOUR VOCABULARY. This gives your child CHOICES IN LIFE. Don t fight - change to let's talk out a solution Don t do this -change too. Let's do this instead. Don t talk to her like that -change to How can we say this differently. Don t climb there too steep -change to-to be aware of your feet as you climb It is very tough not to just say the no or don t. the phrase, as your mind, wants to use that at the moment. Your end goal is to teach your child, to make their own decisions,by changing the wording. WHY? I HEAR YOU SAY! YOU WANT YOUR CHILDREN TO HAVE CHOICES IN LIFE!!!! You also want to bring up a NEW GENERATION of thinkers and decision-makers. With every action, there is a reaction or consequence. I have seen with my children many times over after they fall a couple of times, they will not repeat what caused this to happen. The amazing and powerful side of this is they will start to make decisions when you are not around. As you know you will not always be there to help them make the right choices so it is important to teach them to start thinking for themselves before the consequences are serious, if they practice now the consequences are relatively mild. It is better they learn the process when they are still under your protection for safety.
I Am What I Say I AM
Conscious Parenting-Mistakes Parents make to Destroy Kids Mental Strength!
If you want to Conscious Parent during this time it is worth increasing your children s emotional and mental resilience. If your kids are mentally strong they can cope in the future with problems on their own and engage in life better.
1 Do not minimize your kid's feelings. Tell your kids it is healthy to express their emotions "Do not say do not be sad about if,it is not important, if you say this you are sending a message that feelings do not matter and that it is better to keep them to themselves. If they are scared of a thunderstorm or loud noises say I know you are scared right now. Ask them what they think would make them feel better. This shows them how to manage and cope with emotions on their own. Your goal is to help them practice solutions until they find something that works.
2 Do not always save them from failure. It is difficult to see your child struggle with a challenge if you know you can fix it easily for them. Say you give them the answers to homework they cannot understand this could backfire in the classroom if they cannot explain the answer. Unless they can understand and learn it for themselves. Failure is so important in life for success but most Parents and Schools do not teach this. It is a big part of success if kids never get the chance to learn this lesson on failure. They will never develop perseverance, which they need to rise up after a setback.
3 Overindulging your kid's discipline
parents want and love to give kids whatever they desire, unfortunately, this easy path will not help your kids develop mental strength and self the discipline. Children need to know what they are capable of, the only way to achieve their goal is through hard work and perseverance. Children can learn self-control by clear rules by doing chores, finishing homework, they can earn money from chores and reward themselves, you can also set times for screens or electrical gadgets. Did you know the inventors of tablets do not let their children use them.?
4 Expecting perfection
Do not set the standards too high, this can lead to disappointment and loss of confidence in oneself that could have an impact later on in life, and could cause issues in self-esteem for your child. You may want your child to get big goals and be the best at everything, the truth is in the real world it is not how everything works. Let them build mental strength by making sure expectations are realistic. If they do not meet their goals the setback will teach them valuable lessons on how to do better next time around.
5 Make sure they are always feeling comfortable Just now there are many things that might make your kids feel uncomfortable. doing something NEW TRYING NEW FOODS, MAKING NEW FRIENDS, PLAYING NEW SPORT, MOVING HOMES, HAVING TO GO TO A NEW SCHOOL, GOING OUTSIDE. MEETING PEOPLE.
when they learn to embrace uncomfortable moments like failure they can boost their mental strength. Encourage kids to try new things especially help them at the start, that is the hard part. But once they do the first step. They might realize it is not difficult or they are good at the new thing.
6 Boundaries
you need to have boundaries. Even if you want your kids to make their own decisions. They also need to know who is in charge If you want a curfew for your 12-year old make sure you stick to it every night or as much as possible Kids who are mentally strong have parents who understand the importance of boundaries and consistency. 12-year-old child caving in and allowing rules to be negotiated too often can lead to power struggles between you and your child.
I Am What I Say I AM
I Am What I Say I Am!
"I AM" are two of the most important and powerful words we can say. Do you know why?
The reason is what we put after I AM will shape your reality and manifest what we say out loud. You are either inviting success or inviting failure like I am strong, I am healthy, I am unattractive, I am a terrible person, literally, you are handing an invitation to good or bad things into your life, throughout the day the power of I AM is at work whether we know it or not when you make a mistake you say I AM stupid, you look in the mirror and you say I AM so old when you are stuck in traffic you say I AM so unlucky you are using the power of I AM against yourselves we don`t realise how we are affecting our future, the principle (what follows I AM will always come looking for you) when you say IAM fat calories will come looking for you when you say I AM so old Wrinkles will come looking for you when you say I don't have money poverty will come looking for you. you are literally saying to the universe whatever words I say after the two words (I AM) I am handing an invitation to it to manifest in my life, opening the door giving it permission to be in existence into your life, the good news is we get to choose what follows the I AM when you go through the day saying I AM blessed blessing will come looking for you, I AM healthy, health will start heading your way. that is why you have to be very careful what follows the I AM. you could be inviting disappointment struggles, lack, joy success and health into life. dont ever say I AM unlucky I never get a chance like those people, you are inviting disappointment into your life allowing and giving permission to things you do not want to manifest in reality without realising that words shape our reality you need to mind your language and start sending new invitations to the universe to bring into your life health wealth joy happiness and success. When you wake up in the morning the first thing you should do is send new invitations into the universe inviting the goods things you want to manifest into your life like I AM healthy, IAM strong, I AM happy, I AM blessed, I AM beautiful, I AM lucky, I AM wealthy, I AM prosperous. I AM creative, when you start your day like that health, strength, happiness, blessing, beauty, luck, wealth, prosperity, and creativity, will start heading your way.
The two words (IAM) precede the subconscious beliefs that we program ourselves with literally telling us how to feel in our body and mind. These words also radiate a frequency to attract an outer reality that matches whatever we choose to insert after the words "I AM" we are sending instructions to our body and mind to think, feel, and act a certain way. We are directing our subconscious minds to focus on whatever we tell them to focus on, and it literally filters out everything else. You are saying to yourself, you have to start paying attention to not just your words but also your thoughts. Notice when you say words like, "I am not good enough!", "I am angry", I am tired of that". Do you see how you unconsciously create your experience based on these disempowering beliefs? You have the power to create your experience of life-based on the words you use, which means you need to choose your words wisely. In your life stand firmly in your beliefs of who you are by consciously choosing an empowering ending to the statement that begins with "I AM" as you move through life. Some good ones to try out are I AM attractive wise, powerful, creative, capable, strong, loving, kind, peaceful, funny, compassionate, outgoing, loving, brilliant, pretty, and smart.
It can become a Spiritual Challenge for a parent to accept their children for who they are. Most parents do not like the sound of this, it makes them feel they are giving up and just being stupid. They will say so, do I have just to accept their tantrums and accept they do not want to eat or be nice. No this is not what I mean, you need to accept them as they are and see them in their real spirit. this came into practice massively to me as I have had a personal experience with my child as they could not speak, I was not accepting the situation and lived in denial of the true person and their potential and accept them for who they are. I have learned to come to terms and understand it is not about my feeling but rather the other person in front of me and also learned to deal with similar feelings during homeschooling 6 out of my 8 children over the last 8 years, I had to truly see them and their true spirit, for homeschooling to truly work. We should accept that our children are separate beings from what we want them to become, every parent wants their children to match and mirror their own needs but this is where it all goes wrong because we often want them to become who we were dreaming of becoming. Parents need to understand and connect with their children in the same frequency to be able to guide them and provide the best teaching to acquire the best results for them in life and homeschooling by allowing their spirits to develop at their own pace, The journey becomes more enjoyable and productive for both the parent and the child as the progress unfolds throughout your experience in this quest.
If you are Home -Schooling, young children just now it is possible you are seeing tantrums Stay calm and just relax, every cute kid has a tantrum.
I will explain what they do not mean!
Then what they mean!
What tantrums do not mean!
1 I Hate you You are mean You are a bad parent I am a bad child I am manipulating you I need you to meet every demand that l am yelling I need you to punish me
They do not mean these things BUT they do mean
2 I am overwhelmed I am trying to tell you about a need I HAVE I am possibly hungry, tired, overwhelmed. lonely, or angry and I DO NOT know how to handle that yet
I NEED to know TO LEARN a new way to ask you for this need I am calm. I am new at figuring out big feelings My brain cannot understand feeling this much emotion I NEED YOU TO BE CALM so I cannot figure out these feelings. I Do not want to be acting this way I am watching how you respond to my big feelings so I KNOW HOW to respond next time I LOVE YOU and feel safe with you I have gone through the tantrums lots of times with 8 kids and coaching children and with child nursing hope this helps
What is the perfect calendar for children's activities, do not worry about activities this is not important in the child "s journey. If you have your child doing too many activities you stop them from being themselves. An important thing a child needs is lots of space because enough space in a day is needed for a child to connect to their inner spirit and with their family.
Children are amazing human beings who have the power to learn to ask questions and grow and develop their personalities and drive. If you can be with them and steer them by walking with them in their journey, then, you will become a mentor by doing your best. This will help you through the challenging days of Homeschooling. Nature is available and willing to teach us lessons that will serve us, you should encourage your children to go outside climb trees, paint rocks and run on a beach. instead of being stuck in front of the television or playing on XBOX.
How can you make your children become self-reliant, responsible kids? You can get your kids to start being more responsible, as I mention in my upcoming Home Schooling book. When they look after pets because they have to feed, love, water, nurture. and care for their animal which is their pet. They can also learn trust and learn loyalty it can even build more self-esteem because they might have to show leadership skills with their pet. To start with if they forget to look after them you can do it with them until they become confident and independent. If you think about Homeschooling the word friendship can come to mind some think you cannot be both a parent and a friend but I disagree. What do friends do? , They laugh and get hurt forgive each other and share life experiences with each other and speak the truth if need be, and encourage each other, friends become family, so why can a family not be friends. You can be friends who endure with them who help them become the best versions of themselves. The way we treat each other matters.LOVE is the most profound tool in bringing up our children, a physician once said the cure to human relationships and mental stability is LOVE and someone asked him what if this does not work, then what, the physician said up the dosage of LOVE. Be slow to anger and quick to forgive, show support for them at all times.
Children, often have wants and needs very different from their parents, you need to give them rights and space to explore that. If they have the time to learn and explore learning becomes their own. Lots of people want to Homeschool because they like the organic side of it but have no idea in the Modern World how to start, they want more for their child's future, and they definitely want more for their childhood. There will always be people who misunderstand what, let your children run free means, they think you are just letting your children run wild,that is not it but there is still a structure to learning and organised Homeschooling is driven by a child's needs, that are builtin to learn. This is often stopped by conventional schooling.Homeschooling can actually be a more thorough type of schooling than any other, they will not be held back by the entire class. But you will always have people who need systems and rules to feel secure, they want prescriptions to follow to feel like they have accomplished something, this is why families are scared of missing out on teaching their kids at the start will buy lots of books on everything to do with Homeschooling at the start. Lots of products are not needed as a Homeschooler you actually go and visit where the things actually happened as a homeschooler you have no bells ringing to bring you back home You can actually go to a farm and learn to milk cows and find out about first hand how much milk a cow produces, and ask the farmer about sustainable farming from the farmer. Homeschooling lets your school more, you can school online as tours Khan Academy .internet search engines, Wikipedia, virtual tours of a museum, and books There is no information you cannot access. Children's education is not only made possible by the schooling system in homeschooling, the only gaps in your education are the gaps you have in your curiosity for what you want to learn you do not need a huge box of your own books to teach, you just need walking shoes and a library ticket or computer.
If you compare this to what people think schooling looks like for children, most people, think of classrooms and what class year a child is in and going into. school at 8 .45am finish at 3.20 pm or 4.00pm .Most people believe learning should be work and children should sit at desks and have information being forced into them. Did you know the word education comes from the Latin word educo which means to draw out, the best version of who they are, not to force information on them and force and block their potential of who they could become? Did you know schools were modeled after factories hundreds of years ago, but everyone thinks this is normal because it is there and everyone is used to seeing this? Everyone has forgotten children learn through, play, nature, exploring, and by their own direction, but more and more
children are deprived of this way to learn with freedom instead of long hours of learning methods. You could school by going to nature or the beach and do nature, journals, and read books on subjects you are interested in.
with their partners and kids with them, this has caused a rise of traveling families and World-Schooling. Lots, of people were left with a longing for adventure, after two years of a global, pandemic that forced people to stay where they were. Even though lots of parents did not like the way homeschooling was thrust upon them, it did show children can learn well outside of the classroom. The travel association ABTA did a survey that found 61% of the UK residents want to go abroad in 2022 but they also found hundreds of people had researched websites for traveling full-time with their families. Families want to travel and see diverse cultures, meet new people and appreciate ancient civilizations, Lots of families want a better work-life balance and want to experience things together rather than have material goods. Online work which I have had faith in for ten years, now is finally being seen, as a way to do remote working. An exciting time is coming now for families who will be able to talk about their adventures for years to come. People are not taking life for granted anymore after 2 years of problems they want to back their bags and go traveling. People are selling up and setting off with what they could carry on their backs. Even teachers have seen the pluses of traveling full-time they travel to places like Thailand, India, China, Jordan, Peru, Brazil, Mexico,USA. Some are finding it less expensive than living and shopping in the UK , to travel abroad. Children receive a practical education by seeing different surroundings, people, and languages help, with reading books, about exotic plants, etc They can have lessons wherever you are, they can learn how to cook, paint, or surf in different countries see animals in real life. Travel -Schooling is definitely the schooling my children and family liked the most you learn by seeing the real things like salt lakes, caves, deserts, camels, and dolphins crystals being made in nature. or small Islands. etc.
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